| Chapter 1 PREFACE |
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1. PREFACE 2. INTRODUCTION 3. MY
YOUTH 4. AT
THAT SIDE 6. DARKEN
NIGHT OF THE SOUL 7. THE
HOLY VALLEY 8. MY
LIFE MYTH 9. HEALING
THE PLANET 10. The
size of NUT/MOTHER 11. REVERSAL 12. EPILOG 1. VORWORT 2. EINFÜHRUNG 3. MEINE
JUGEND 4. AN
JENER SEITE 6. DUNKLE NACHT DER SEELE ("Talpredigt") Der Abstieg Die Tiefe Die Rückkehr 8. MEIN LEBENSMYTHOS Zurückblickend Mitgefühl Erneuerung 9. HEALING THE PLANET 10. DIE
GROßE MUTTER 11. KEHR UM 12. EPILOG |
It is not so simple to write for this Autobiografie of Han Marie Stiekema a preface. Its life is so unusual that I query myself, whether there is someone in this world at all with comparable experiences. I, when simple soul knows, hardly, how one is to then know Han Marie? In addition it comes still that one does not mark in daily handling anything to it. He is simple humans not to fathom very openly and nevertheless he is helpful in the reference to its fellow men and a good friend. If one does not ask it anything - questions in relationship with the substantial one - then it also nothing suggest, will abandon or reveal. It moves inconspicuously, lives simply its daily life and is therefore hardly well-known. However, where he is asked, it makes however deep impression. I experienced quite often that, after' a substantial question' is asked to it a metamorphosis comes in him. It is, as if it comes out from another dimension. The whole area fills with an energy, which is not to be defined. Its voice changed, is deeper, its eyes radiates and some sees an aura around its head; after first hesitating it comes into enthusiasm. It occurs that the glow of its passion spreads to its listeners, who come thereby into oscillation. The love, which is he, is everywhere perceptible. With its listeners often visible emotion is caused. Or that people shift at one time with far-opened eyes and right back. It does not take a sheet before the mouth. Its talc are no maintenance meetings; as representatives of the truth it can be confronting much. In addition it uses in my opinion some cheats. It provokes gladly, for example if it is in society from people, which have certain expectations. I experienced once that in a hall with 200 humans approximately one half was whole in its spell, and which seemed to be detuned other half. It does not fit into an atmosphere of' we mirror-image-ritual among us'. By its own background he feels perfectly, on which level someone is. That is always removed from it in thanks, surely not by those, thinks for knowing. Its order is it, everyone, the contact to it seeks, the way, to hold the truth and the life before eyes. On the side humans want very probably' release', but are on the other hand not not ready them to pay the price. Indeed giving an I-oriented, addicted or pseudomirror-image-ritual life up. For most people Spiritualität is a nice (secondary) thing, an interesting propagation of the existing activities. Something with which one to up-deseam itself can. But, then Han Marie says, „only if you you even gives up, you behind it will come ". It seems to be like that that Han Marie actually pulls spontaneously above all those, which look for upright and with their whole heart the Anspruchslosigkeit and the true. Those are not as many. I cannot say that he regrets it. It prefers above all the contact with humans with pure intentions exposing instead of improper arrogances or shifting' an impact in the Kontor'. That does not want to say however that he is not there for all. Its own way indicated that to it. It began with its large experiences, which came suddenly and from cheerful sky, totally unprepared, over him. In this sense it was like ‚a unbefleckte Empfängnis'. Its implementations' happened' without each own effort, without each intention, ambition or demand. The innocence can reveal itself only to the innocence! To this point it could itself have already proven as teachers. The paradoxes it is that many teachers already announce themselves after the first' signs' because them think that they reached' it'. Han Marie however - straight because it the whole illuminating cycle had gone through, including the very strange' Auferstehung from death' - did not respect itself in the conditions the Göttliche world-wide to verkündigen. Not only, because from that nothing nothing goes out - it is perfectly itself even - but also because it was conscious to it that some more lies had remained. Therefore it did, what only few did, i.e. again' a step withdraw', as he expressed „around the old even into the new identity inside fit to let ". Although it could cultivate its internal condition further and its biography behind itself could have left, has it voluntarily its past on itself taken. It went through fifteen long years, what goes through everyone of us, if he becomes conscious. Indeed afterwards the acceptance and integration of pain, mourning, fear, faint, Selbstgefälligkeit, uncertainty and rage. It did not remain for it anything saved. It out of the way, it did not go to anything pulled itself not back into its internal Paradies, although it could have done each instant. Without defending itself, it took also the Verständnislosigkeit, the mockery and the condemnation of its environment on itself. If it cannot even accept its own suffering, as it is to be able to carry a suffering of its fellow men then was its behind-lying consideration. Abgedroschene cliches like for example that' illuminated masters' do not know, point a suffering he therefore resolut from the hand. Suffering is not you is it there, only. Internally you remain “unaffected”. One while comes and disappears again to you, remains. This applies to all those becomes conscious. With the masters it applies all the more. Straight one by which one in the deepest nature is free, can one a' suffering of the world on itself take'. Their suffering increases rather as it decreases. That is also the reason why Han Marie continues then sympathy for the individual fellow man. He sees the immoral starting points of our society hair sharp: „Credit is the inability to be”. There humans and societyliving organism are, are alone not the individual healing enough. If you awoke, then you still another step must go further: indeed “in your sympathy also include the whole world”. Ten years in highest luck blessedness and about twenty years at' the dark night of the soul', lie now behind it. The legend-clung is not said however yet. Something that I tried in vain with other teachers to find. The latters mostly regard' their implementing' as high point of their career. The authority of the championship is based on it. But not with Han Marie. With inconsiderate honesty opposite it had to admit that it does not have the “all-last unit” despite' its' complete illuminating yet' reached'. He again and again came into the temptation to use its implementing for own (Ego) purposes. That was a dreadful internal argument to hardly describe. Often he did not know still out. In this condition it began to dawn it that ‚illuminating could not be last the latter'. It had to still be ‚somewhat behind it', something that from its obsessions could release it. It confronted it on the new with its large experiences. And it saw it sudden. Before it came up in the large light, its whole existence was wiped out for one moment by cosmic lightning. There had to thus be something, what there before the light was: absolute the nothing! Thus it seems a hierarchy gives: only the nothing, then the light. Therefore: absolute the nothing precedes the light (the Göttliche, Buddha nature). It felt a so deep easement never before. It was released from (its identification with) illuminating. Freely of the liberty…. thereafter much everything on its place. Absolute the nothing is equal to a vacuum, which cosmic Gebärmutter - at archäischen times ‚the large nut/mother' mentioned - from which everything, both God and the world, is born and again returns. Finally it took still some years, before it showed up with ‚the large nut/mother'. It had nevertheless lived twenty-three years long in the acceptance that illuminating would be last the latter and in addition nothing more. Now it had to literally make a case of knee. Which on side was a reason for continuous joy and gratitude was, on the other side nevertheless unusually. Even no more the last authority to be, did not require a thorough conversion. Fortunately it experienced the failure ‚of the self implementing' in extremely embarrassing way at the own body. Thereby for the first time in its life moments of true humility overcame it opposite the immeasurable-deep Mysteriums of the nut/mother. Since he knew that this - devotion - was most difficult for him, sent him the nut/mother an auxiliary worker. In wondrous way crossed Teresa of Avila its way. Immediately it the range of this meeting was clear. He saw as much points of contact with it that he could not that this was so meant ‚by planning'. It led it far on the way of the humiliatingness, devotion and Selbstlosigkeit. Straight ones by it it feels strengthened, in order to deliver its mission into the world. It is that, out ‚banishing returned' around humans on its way ‚back to house' to accompany. It has the treasure retained - the inheritance of us all - in you was lost by the addiction after you even. Excluding yours ‚own illuminating to after-strive', while the earth is at the same time ever more destroyed - that one does not know involved actual however no more. It concerns to be now rather, “you even in solidarity', in unit of the vertical one with that to horizontals; that is it, for which it goes now. Together ‚the kingdom of sky and earth' establish to seize therein the initiative regard it therefore as the most important element of its mission. Nothing special, if one considers that everyone should use itself, in order to save the earth. How is one to thus designate it? The German word ‚hope carriers' would not stand for it badly. With the publication of its Schriftstellerei it has recently admits itself made. It is available. Because of us is it now, it, to discover and the nut/mother. Around our internal implementation thereafter to spread into our environment. Erselbst says: ” From the Wesenlichen resemblance, that is the most precious gift finds in this existence ". Peter Cornwall, Los Angeles, Californien © 1999 Copyright by Han M. Stiekema. Alle Rechte vorbehalten |